When I applied for the opportunity to present on a TED stage I thought it was a longshot. When I received the email saying that I was selected and would have the opportunity to present my emotions went wild. Excitement, nervousness, happiness, fear, joy, all followed by a bit of imposter syndrome, mixed with humility, right back to excited.
A bit all over the place.
But after I was able to calm down, breath, and really begin to think about the opportunity in front of me, what was on my mind the most was, having to sit down and write the talk. I am sure I, like most of us reading this, have seen a TED talk and said, “If I could give a TED talk I would give it on…(fill in the blank) and it would be amazing”. Now with the chance to pony up on my wishful thinking, to say it is tough, would grossly underestimate the feeling.
I do not believe that it is tough, or hard per se, rather, it is something that I want to get so right that it makes the flashing cursor on a word document intimidating. The cursor is this invitation to write something that matters, that people will hear and see on a platform I have dreamed of contributing to, and the more it flashed the more intimidated I was getting.
In time, I had to move past the fear, the doubt, the desire for the perfect opening or closing, and just let the words flow. And that flow of words has been the most exciting part of the process. Allowing my talk to grow, shift, move, and evolve as the words just flowed.
What I look forward to almost more than the stage to share it on, is the final version of my talk. I believe that it will be something that I will be proud of, and will speak volumes silently from its home in my word document, and on the TED stage.